21 Day Cleanse...We Can Do It!!!!!!

Life presents you with lots of things that you cannot control.  You can't control what other people do, those pesky things that pop up when you least expect it, like needing new brakes and tires for your car all at the same time, and you can't control the fact that you have cancer.  You have all heard the saying 'when life gives you lemons, make lemonade', or my favorite, 'when life gives you tomatoes, you make Bloody Marys'.  And if you know me, then you have probably heard me say more than once 'it is what it is'.  I have learned that I must relinquish my control and a lot of aspects of my life at the moment, because I can't do anything to change it.  I just so happened to be reading Kris Carr's Crazy Sexy Diet book at the same time I was thinking about the lack of control I had in my life as it relates to cancer.  I realized that eating healthy, or more importantly, stepping my healthy eating up a notch was something I could totally control.      

If you are familiar with Kris, you already know she is passionate about healthy eating and emphasizes the vast health benefits of eating vegan and drinking green juices.  If you are interested in changing your diet and getting healthy, I recommend picking up this book and giving it a shot.  It's an easy read.  I guarantee you will think about food differently even if you don't embrace every aspect.

Steve and I are dipping our toes in the world of juicing and some of her vegan recipes (the black bean burgers were delicious).  We attempted juicing during my first phase of chemo to help keep my strength up, but it was hard for me to stomach any of the juices Steve attempted to make.  Now that I am over that hump and feeling pretty good, I am able to enjoy the green juices.  Now, I know what you are thinking.  There is no way Steve will be able to go without meat and dairy.  You are probably right, but we are cutting back to only a few days a week and even Steve has noticed a difference.

In her book, Kris includes a 21 days cleanse that includes eating raw veggies, fruits, gluten free breads & pasta, green juices & smoothies, and no SUGAR, caffeine, or animal products (meat, eggs, dairy).  I have been talking about this for weeks now, and I have inlisted several friends and co-workers to join the fun.  We are starting the cleanse 9/17.  It's still a few weeks away, but I wanted to give everyone lots of time to prepare, and I also wanted to get through all my chemo treatments before I cut out meat and dairy completely.  I am maintaining my weight, but not gaining, and I don't want to loose any more prior to being done chemo.  I always say the more the merrier, so if anyone is interested in the 21 day cleanse let me know.  I am excited to hear what everyone thinks and how they feel once we are done. 

                                                              Cheers to the green juice

Boobies............................

It’s ironic how life works out sometimes.  It was always a debate on whether my breasts were real or fake.  I was blessed with being skinny and having nice sized boobs (as were my other sisters).  I have made it to 31 being able to say proudly, yup they are the real deal.  This will not be the case for much longer.  My new response when asked will be, yup they're fake, but I don't have cancer anymore!!!!

Friday after my chemo treatment, I met with the plastic surgeon for my consultation.  I knew going in that my reconstruction options were going to be limited since I will be undergoing radiation, and I don't have a lot of extra body fat, so I tried not to be discouraged.  The only option for me given my slim size (no tummy tuck option) is to have implants.  Radiation, however, will make it a little more challenging.  After radiation, my own tissue is needed to support a permanent implant.  Most of the times, an implant is used in combination with a latissimus dorsi or t-DAP flap.  This would be done at the time of the mastectomy.  At this point, I am not a good candidate for this.  So, we have a few challenges.  One of them is figuring out the best way to hold the implant in while making it symmetrical with the other (non radiation) side.  Another is dealing with the skin changes as a result of radiation.  The surgeon did say it might be possible to use liposuction and injecting some fat into the reconstructed breast where needed to improve the symmetry and contour.


The most troublesome problem with using implants as opposed to my own tissue, is something called capsular contracture.  This occurs if the scar or capsule around the implant begins to tighten.  Capsular contracture can be treated in several ways, and it sometimes requires either removal or scouring of the scar tissue, or perhaps removal or replacement of the implant.  Radiation therapy dramatically increases the risk of tightness around the implant due to radiation fibrosis of all the surrounding tissue.  This could mean many additional procedures and problems post reconstruction.

Since I will be undergoing radiation after the mastectomy, I will need tissue expanders beneath my skin and chest muscle.  This tissue expander is a silicone balloon which will be filled (expanded) with saline to help stretch the muscle and remaining breast skin to the reconstructed breast size.  I may be able to get a couple expansions in before I start radiation, but once I start treatment I will not be able to be expanded until radiation is complete.  Reconstruction will be done somewhere between 3-6 months after radiation is complete.  Everything will hinge on how I heal, skin conditions, and how the expanding is going.

All things considering, the appointment went well, and I have lots more information to think about and research as we move forward with everything.  I have read a lot about how some women grieve the loss of their breasts.  I think I am ok with it at this point.  I think it will be difficult if I do end up having more children not to have the option of breastfeeding, but that's something to deal with/think about another day.  Given everything that I have been through so far, I feel like it's just one of the next steps to a long healthy and happy future.  So, whatever it takes................bring it on.

Phase 2 - 50%

Today I am excited to say that I am 50% through phase 2 of my chemo treatments.  I have six more to go before I can finally yell from the roof tops "NO MORE CHEMO FOR ME!!!!"

We are all hanging in, and I am feeling pretty good.  No major side effects yet from Taxol.  I am still in a constant state of being tired, but I seem to push through it for the most part.  Charlotte definitely keeps me on my toes around here.  She is crawling and pulling up on things and will be walking in no time.

My hair is coming back despite the Taxol.  I think the three week break I had to take gave it a jumpstart.  It appears I may be able to skip that side effect.  I am still preparing for it to start thinning out, but so far so good.  A lady at Target yesterday told me she loved my haircut.  My hair is definitely not long enough to be mistaken for a haircut, but she was sweet to say that.

The hot flashes seem to have lessened up a little, but they still pop up, especially at night.

So far I have completed 10 total chemo treatments with 6 more to go!!!!!!

Rebounding

I have finally rebounded.  My ANC count today was 2,569.  That's a huge jump from Sunday's 190.  I will be able to have chemo on Friday as planned.  Things are looking up.  Thanks for all the prayers and thoughts.

Home Sweet Home

Yay!  I am home from the hospital.  I was released Sunday afternoon, and Steve and I were both very excited to get home and see our Char Char.  She gave us each a big hug when she got home.

My counts are rising and were at 190 when I was released.  Still not where we want them to be, but definitely improving.  Tomorrow I go back so they can check to make sure they are still rising.  If all goes well this week, I will be able to have chemo on Friday as scheduled.  I am feeling much better.  We still have to be really careful since my counts are pretty low.  I am taking two different types of antibiotics to help fight some of my exposure.


 

Slowly but Surely

My counts are slowly on the rise and are currently 100 - Woo Hoo!  I am feeling good.  Just waiting for a good count so I can be released.  I am starting to go a little stir crazy being here and definitely missing my girl.  Hopefully, this time tomorrow I am home.  Six days here is plenty.         

Monday - 0
Tuesday - 0
Wednesday - 21
Thursday - 0
Friday - 41
Saturday - 100

Extended Stay at Hotel Hopkins

My counts took an exciting leap to 21 yesterday.  They have, however, taken a not-so-good decrease back to 0 today.  So far, all my bacterial and viral tests have been negative, so they are not really sure what is suppressing my bone marrow.  There are still some tests cooking that might point us in a direction of an infection in the next day or so.  I have not had a fever since my first day here, so that is definitely a good sign.  Overall, I am feeling pretty good.  Tired and a little run down feeling, but that’s to be expected from chemo and having low counts.  If my counts are still not up in 4-5 days, they will talk to the Hematologist here on what other options we can disucss to increase my ANC levels. 

I will be here for at least a few more days and quite possibly over the weekend.  My spirits are still holding strong, and I am trying not to get too discouraged about my counts.  I am definitely missing my baby girl.  Steve got to spend some good time with her yesterday evening, so it was nice she got to see her daddy for a little bit.

Thanks for all the prayers and thoughts over the last few days.  Continue to pray that my counts will increase (preferably on their own), and that I will be able to head home soon.  It is somewhat of a comfort to be here away from germs, not that I am 100% protected since I am in a hospital, but the protocol for my floor is pretty good at protecting the cancer patients from germy germs.